Why I said, "YES"...a Day in Oklahoma City

Oklahoma City: An Example of Peace on Earth

Oklahoma City: An example of Peace on Earth by Andrea Hylen

(This was originally published in Beloved World- Voices of Peace Newsletter Sept 2008) 

Voices of Peace: Sept 2008

July 7, 2008 - A journal entry

Words seem so inadequate on this day.

By spending the morning and the evening at the Oklahoma City Memorial, I feel that my life has been touched in a profound way. I sit here staring at the blank page feeling the stillness, not knowing how to capture this experience in words.

A field of empty chairs represents the lives lost on April 19, 1995. My heart felt like it was bursting open when I first entered the Memorial Gateway. Tears ran down by cheeks, as I opened to the emotion. I felt  like my heart was bursting with love and gratitude. Love and gratitude? This took me by surprise. I found out later that the entrance we walked through was the Door of Hope. And that is what I felt.

Through the tragedy of loss, the powerful emotions of forgiveness, healing, hope and love have arisen here. Beginning with the people who responded with help immediately, to those who came from afar, to the words of love from children, this is an example of the hope and beauty that is arising on the planet.

 

 

The people of Oklahoma City have risen from the ashes and chosen peace. They are an example of peace on Earth as we each make conscious choices for inner peace.

An educator in the museum shared the peace programs that have been birthed here. Conflict resolution classes in schools; Cards and artwork from children, like the tile that reads, ”The world cares.” Sharing tools of peace with the children.

Every night when the sun goes down, the lights below each chair shine brighter and brighter. As the darkness spreads throughout the city, I see the moon at the highest point in the sky. There is stillness. The chairs that represent loss are transformed and emerge into brilliant candles of hope and light.

 

I see in this moment, it is in the greatest times of darkness that we become the brightest lights.

 

 

 

Why I said, "YES" ...to become a Minister of Spiritual Peacemaking

I never had an aspiration to be a minister. And even though I am ordained now, it still sounds strange to say the word minister. I know it is the essence of who I am, but I wonder about the word. 

Although I have always had a deep sense of spirituality and have attended a variety of churches and explored different religions, the image of what I thought an ordained minister would be didn't seem to fit with me. It was as far from my thoughts as becoming a baseball player or a ballerina. I had an appreciation of the profession, but it wasn’t a path I felt  “called” to explore.

In 2005, my husband died and I became a grieving widow who was healing and picking up the pieces. Six months later, I found myself saying, “YES!” to studying a spiritual peacemaking ministry program.

It was the dead of winter in Baltimore, Maryland. I was regularly waking up at 3 am with a strong desire to study…something. For two months, I woke up at this early hour, lit a variety of candles of a different sizes and shapes on the mantle over the fireplace. I sat in meditation and began to study for 2-3 hours. I read a variety of books, underlined words, sentences and paragraphs with a highlighter marker and took notes in a journal. I read books about fairies in the garden, animal spirits, shamanism, Huna rituals from Hawaii, the Course in Miracles, conscious evolution and a variety of hands on healing modalities. Some of the books had been a part of my life for twenty years and others were an exploration of something new.

I felt like I was back in college. My soul was craving something. The feeling was so intense I felt like I was starving and would die if I didn't wake up and study. The internal pull towards this became my Yes! One day at a time, I rolled out of bed, heated water for tea, started a fire, lit the candles, read and studied. Every morning I felt my thirst was quenched until the next morning when I was pulled into this again.

One morning I woke up at 2am, with an urgency to study a deeper spiritual program. I felt like I was shot out of a canon with the feeling of "Do it now!" I felt guided to get on the internet and search for a program to study; Jean Houston, Sonia Choquette, Barbara Marx Hubbard and a variety of mystery schools. I finally found James Twyman's Beloved Community Ministry Program. I had participated in peace programs with James for ten years. The energy and aliveness was surging through me. The Beloved Community program was shifting from a two-year program with a master's degree to a three month intensive.

I was ready. The discipline was instilled in me from two months of preparation. I continued waking up early, and studied the assignments.

After 11 weeks, I completed the program and registered for the retreat where I would be ordained as a Minister of Spiritual Peacemaking. I had not consciously chosen the path of ministry. I was a widow with a broken heart. My heart was cracked wide open and ready to receive an inner guidance.

In my grieving, the path had chosen me.